Healing His Heart
by BloodSoakedBroadway
Summary: Kellic! Kellin is an abused sophomore, Vic is a senior with a perfect life.
1. Chapter 1

Kellin Quinn is a beautiful soul. There isn't really another way to word it. He is beautiful, inside and out. But of course, the high school sophomore can't see it. He believes that he is worthless, ugly, useless, disgusting, and alone. He's a shy boy who doesn't talk to anybody in his classes at school.

Vic Fuentes is pretty arrogant. Really he acts tough to hide his tender heart, because "that's gay". He isn't gay, no sir. He screws girls all the time, almost every girl in the school has been with him at some point. But he can never quite get over the feeling that it isn't right, he still feels drawn to boys. But he isn't gay. Nope. Straighter than the pole your mom dances on. _Ha,_

"You're homework over the weekend is to finish that study guide and your presentations on the Prussian-German War. Test is Monday, presentations are due Tuesday. Have a good weekend."  
The history teacher finished just as the bell rang. Seventh period was out, school was over, and the weekend was here. Kellin waited until almost everyone had left the classroom before he picked up his backpack to leave. He didn't want to run into any more students. They hated him, they all hated him. Why would they like a freak like him? In this small town it was enough to be gay. Let alone anorexic and socially awkward. And ugly. As he walked out the classroom he noticed that Vic was still in there. Just...sitting at his desk. He was looking down at his blank notebook; just...staring. Weird. Kellin pondered this as he took his stuff out of his locker, as he got his guitar out of the band room, and as he strolled, head down, to the edge of town. That unbelievably good-looking senior, just sitting at his desk. He wasn't moving at all. The far off look in his amber eyes haunted Kellin's thoughts all day. The younger boy couldn't stop thinking about him as he sat in that forest that borders town, where he spends most of his days. Just writing songs, doing homework, sleeping, day dreaming, finding reasons not to go back to his house. It wasn't safe there...

Vic Fuentes had slipped into a funk lately. Maybe it was depression, he didn't know. He didn't have any reason to be depressed though, his life was perfect. He partied every weekend, his parents didn't really care what he did, he was pretty much rich because of his dads share in an oversea oil company, he had fairly good grades, lots of friends, and pretty much did what he wanted. Everyone wanted to be him. He had no right not to be happy. _You know full well why you're not happy, Vic. You've been pretending to be this other person far too long. _He shook his head to stop himself from thinking. _You're fine._ He didn't want to go home though, not today. Strangely, he didn't really want to go to anybody's house to hook up either. It's not like he didn't have the choice. So the short Latino got in his Lexus (seriously, his dad had money) and just drove around. After about an hour he spotted the forest on the outskirts of town and thought, _ Huh, why not? _He parked his car on the side of the road, hit the lock button twice, and stalked off into the woods. His tan feet walked for about twenty minutes when he heard it, a guitar. Someone really good at playing guitar was doing it and singing,

"And I don't want the world to see me, 'cause I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am"

It was a girl's voice, and it sounded absolutely beautiful. She was changing up the song a little, adding her own twist to it. It sounded like an angel singing, '_maybe you ARE straight._'  
Vic went on ninja mode, treading as quietly as possible so as not to spook her, he didn't want her to stop singing.

"And you can't find the tears that ain't coming, or the moment of truth in your lies. When everything feel like the movies, yeah you bleed just to know you're alive."

_SNAP!_ Vic stepped on a stick and the singing stopped. _'Shit!_'  
"Hello?", a voice called out, frightened, shaky, but unmistakably male. The Hispanic boy took a deep breath and a few more steps, then took in the picture in front of him. A small boy with milky white skin and long, wavy, black hair was sitting on the ground, leaning against a log, a guitar in his lap and paper scattered all around him. His piercing ice-blue eyes were wide with surprise, and he looked utterly confused and adorable. God, he was beautiful. '_Straight.'_He looked vaguely familiar but Vic couldn't place him. No one else was in the clearing, no girl, just the boy. Vic would guess he was a junior, but they must not have any classes together. Surely he would remember a fave like that.

"Uh... Hey, how's it going?"

Kellin thought he was going to die. What was Vic Fuentes doing in his sacred place? Why was Vic Fuentes talking to him? What the fuck was going on? He couldn't find words to answer, his mouth got all dry and his hands got all sweaty. So he just nodded at his guitar as an answer. He was sure the angelic Mexican would leave in just a moment and that this was all a dream. But, if it was a dream... Hell, he was gorgeous. His smooth tan skin was stretched over finely tuned muscles that weren't too big, and his chest was quite visible underneath the v-neck tee he was wearing. Straight dark brown hair fell to his shoulders and was swept across his forehead in a perfect fringe. His lips were a neutral pink, and full and shiny and totally kissable... And they were talking, pulling Kellin out of his own thoughts.

"So... uhh... It looks like I'm interrupting you here... I'll leave you alone."

Wait, what? No! Kellin finally finds his voice, "You can stay if you want to," it was quiet, and he wasn't even sure why he said it. He half hoped the senior didn't hear it, but was entirely relieved when he did.

"Umm Okay. What are you doing?"

The smaller boy wasn't sure how to act, he was terrified of saying the wrong thing. Oh God this was awkward. '_What the fuck are you doing Kellin?_'

"I was just uh.. playing guitar."

"Was that you singing earlier?" Vic's chocolate eyes were trying to consume all of Kellin's ability to gather thoughts. Wait, he had heard him singing? A deep blush filled his pale cheeks and the moss beneath his feet suddenly became very interesting,

"Uhh I-I-I... Yeah..." The older boy gave him a huge smile and his heart melted out between his toes. "You sounded really good. Your voice is so high." Oh god, was he making fun of him? Of course, there's a reason nobody had ever heard Kellin sing, he was terrible. He was terrible at everything. And his blush just got worse.

'_Holy fuck, he's beautiful' _ God, Vic, stop. What was he doing? Making a great big fool of himself that's for sure. "_your voice is so high"? Really Vic? Really?' _Well, it was time to be brave again. He took a deep breath and sat down across from the smaller boy, who watched him with giant blue eyes the whole time. Then he heard a voice, that really quiet, but surprisingly deep voice, "So umm what are you doing here?" That was a good question, what _was _Vic doing here?  
"I dunno. Just chillin' I guess."

Kellin raised a perfecctly sculpted brow, "You're out walking in the woods, in the middle of no where, just...chilling?"

"Uhh yeah... But you are too." This was true, the pale skinned boy was just out here, alone with his guitar.

"So uh, haha, come here often?" Vic asked jokingly, trying to break the ice. Those cobalt eyes averted back to the guitar in bony, white hands.

"Every day..."

"You come here every day?"

"Yup," the reply was curt, almost rude. He was probably annoying the other boy.

"So... yeah. I'm gonna go now. See ya." He tore his eyes away from the beautiful creature in front of him and forced his body to stand up.

"Bye."  
The small Latino turn his back and slowly started to walk back into the trees. He stopped, "I'm Vic, bye the way. I didn't catch your name."

The reply was slow to come and impossibly quiet, Vic wasn't even sure he heard it, "Kellin. My name's Kellin."

Kellin. It was such an odd name, but it suited the small, strange, and utterly beautiful boy with the wild blue eyes. Vic found himself thinking about him the whole drive home, and into the night. Who was this mysterious Kellin?

The man in question was having a similar problem. Was what happened earlier even real? As soon as the Mexican had gone it seemed as if he was never there. The papers were still there, haphazardly scattered everywhere, the guitar case was still there, left open, his backpack was still there, unzipped, with a few notebooks falling out. Kellin was still there, stunned, confused, and now feeling a little lonely without Vic's presence. Everything was the same. Everything except Kellin of course, something in him was changed. His interest was sparked for once, someone had spoken to him. He wasn't sure he liked it either.


	2. Chapter 2

That night Kellin went home to find his stepfather passed out on the couch. Meaning he was unconscious and wouldn't want to "talk". Thank god.

Kellin's mother had died in a car crash the year after her and Frank got married, Kellin was only 7. After his mother died Frank slipped into depression and became an alcoholic. Soon after he started beating his stepson, occasionally at first, but then the thrashings became more regular and more brutal. When Kellin was 9 years old Frank raped him the first time, this became a fairly regular thing also. As did the dark haired boy skipping meals and self-harming. He babysat four nights a week, so he'd have enough money to buy clothes every once in a while.  
But this night there was none of that, so he just walking up to his room to finish homework, shower, and go to bed.

Vic, however, was not planning on going to bed tonight. It was Friday, he had people to see, parties to go to, alcohol to consume, and all sorts of terrible things to do. So he went out and did just that.

The next morning he awoke in his friend's house with some girl he had never seen before in bed with him. _Huh, must've been a fun night._ Prior to the night's events he clearly remembers setting a goal: he would just screw girls until he was straight. No, wait, he _was_ straight. He had absolutely no feelings for this Kellin kid, he barely knew him.  
The Latino checked his phone, 11:24 a.m. He took another glance at the thin blonde laying under the sheet next to him, she was beautiful. He didn't really feel anything when he looked at her though, more like brotherly love. Which was really weird considering he probably fucked her the night before. He kissed her forehead, then got out of bed and found his clothes.  
After checking in with his mom at home and grabbing some food and a shower he climbed back into his car. Much to his surprise he found himself back at the woods, parking in the same spot. Almost without thinking he found himself getting out of the vehicle and strolling into the forest. He had no idea what he's find, or why he was even there. He didn't really expect Kellin to be there again, but that doesn't mean he wasn't hoping he would be.  
He walked to the place where he had last seen the boy, he wasn't there. After heaving a small sigh and then mentally chewing himself out for getting his hopes up, then arguing with himself for hoping anything (because he was _straight_), he decided to keep walking. He had never been this far into the forest; except for yesterday of course.

Kellin ducked his head as he snuck through the kitchen, shoes in hand, socked feet silent on the hardwood floor. In his dark head he was praying to some god somewhere that he wouldn't wake up the still sleeping Frank. His prayers were not answered.  
"KEEEELLIIIIN! Get your scrawny, good-for-nothing ass back here!"  
The roar echoed around the once beautiful house, and right through the frail boy's bones. He, of course, complied and walked as calmly as he could to the living room. What he found there was like something from a nightmare. Not most people's nightmares, just his. Frank sat on the couch, stained white t shirt two sizes too small, red eyes glazed over, greasy Bermuda shorts propped up with something Kellin recognized too well. The smaller of the men stood still, eyes downcast, waiting for the terrible orders sure to come.  
"Get on your knees." He did as he was told.  
"No, stand up. Now take off your shirt. Look at me when I talk to you goddamnit! Aww, look at all these scars, oh and fresh cuts too! Has poor little Kellin been sad lately? Here, let me kiss it better…" He lashed out and smacked the pale chest in front of him. Kellin only flinched a little, but the force of the blow sent him backward a few steps. The overweight, foul-smelling man smirked a little, and said in an almost sweet voice, "Oh I'm sorry honey. Was I too rough? Come closer." An already bruising body moved closer, only to catch a blow to the stomach. This one dropped him to the ground. Frank stood up and started kicking him, in the stomach, the head, the crotch, the back, wherever he could. This continued until the ogre exhausted himself.  
"Stand up bitch. Come sit by me." With great difficulty Kellin dragged himself up and onto the filthy sofa. They sat quietly for a second, then, without saying a word Frank stood Kellin up, pulled down his black skinny jeans, and pulled him onto his lap…

Thirty minutes later Kellin was in his place in the woods, sitting on the log. He closed his blue-grey eyes for a moment and tried to calm himself. It did no good however, so he reached into his pocket and pulled out a mostly empty wallet. From this he got a razor blade, from a boxcutter he bought along while ago. The fair-skinned boy pulled up a sleeve of his torn, black hoodie, exposing the ridged skin underneath. On the underside of his arm the layers of scars were so deep he couldn't even see his natural skin colour. He set the razor blade against his skin, and just looked at it. Then he pushed it harder and slid it slowly sideways, drawing a thin line of blood. _Not big enough._ Without thinking he began to move the razor with an almost chopping motion, making lots of small, deep wounds.

Vic was just heading back to his car, not sure what to do with the rest of his day. Maybe he would stop in the clearing a while, he probably need some time to think. The Mexican's thoughts were cut short when he got there.  
"Kellin! What the fuck are you doing man?!"


	3. Chapter 3

Vic couldn't believe his eyes. He stood there stunned for a moment, taking in the beautiful boy in front of him, skinny arm covered in scars and scabs and fresh cuts. There was a razor blade in his hand, blood was…everywhere. On the blade, on his hands, on the ground. So much blood. The giant blue eyes looked up at him in utter surprise. Finally the Latino remembered how to speak, and yelled something along the lines of "what are you doing". The next thing he knew he had thrown the razor away and was sitting next to Kellin, an arm around his shoulder. The smaller boy was still frozen stiff; his arm was still bleeding and uncovered. Blue eyes looking at the ground, brown eyes looking at the bloody arm.  
After about ten minutes Vic pushed the shaking shoulders away and held onto them, looking into the painfully sad eyes. They looked back for a while, then down at the ground in shame. He reached up to gently touch the bruised face, but stopped when it flinched.  
"Hey," the tan one whispered, "It's okay. I'm not going to hurt you. Ever."  
_Ugh. Why did I add that last part? Ever? What's that supposed to mean?_  
It didn't look like Kellin noticed. He looked back into Vic's eyes for one fleeting moment, then pulled away, ran a hand through his hair, pulled down his sleeve, and ran off. The Mexican didn't know what to do; he sat there and debated a while, then took off after the younger boy.

Kellin's mind was racing even faster than his heart as he ran. _  
What was Vic doing there? Had he seen the cuts? Of course he did, you idiot. You worthless, fat, disgusting idiot. He's seen what a monster you are. He'll never talk to you again. Please, you didn't have a chance with him anyway. Look at yourself, freak.  
_He ran until he was quite out of breath and thought he was far enough away, and leaned against a tree. He pulled up the black sleeve to review the damage. It was bad, but he had done worse in the past. His dark hair hit the bark on the tree hard and his body sagged against it. Now what? Then he heard footsteps and, "Kellin? Are you over here bro?" _No. I'm not.  
_The tan, kind face appeared a few feet away, "There you are… "He just stood there, looking far too perfect. Kellin just looked back, wondering what the other boy would do. Which, for a long while, was nothing. He just stood there. It didn't look like he knew what to do either. Unable to handle it Kellin finally spoke up, "I'm sorry you had to see that…" It was almost too quiet for Vic to hear. He heard it though, and his eyebrows shot up, "What? No… Don't-don't be sorry. It's okay. We-no- it's not okay. It's bad. No! I didn't-I-I meant it makes me sad…"  
_What? _"Why would anything I do make you sad?"  
The Latino's eyes softened, he looked about read to cry, "Because I… I care about you Kellin."  
_What?! _The thin boy's face betrayed his thoughts and looked dazed. _Surely he means just like, as a person. Yeah, because Vic is a good person. That's all.  
_Vic also looked a little dazed for a moment. Then he caught himself, and stammered, "Like, as a person. I uh… I don't like, uh, you're just a cool guy. It would really blow if you died or something…" He winced at his own clumsiness and Kellin let a tiny sigh escaped his lips.  
_See? Just a nice guy. A nice, beautiful, tall, strong guy with a great body… Ah! No. You have no chance with him. No chance Kellin. Don't get your hopes up.  
_He decided to get control of the situation before things got even more awkward. "I'll see you around," was all he could manage before jogging away. As good as that sounded Kellin decided against it, why torture himself more?  
"No thanks."

After Vic was gone Kellin melted to the ground, laid on his back, and looked up at the bit of grey sky he could see between trees. The small boy didn't move, just laid there and felt his body aching. He wondered to himself, '_Will it always be this hard? Will life ever be worth living again?  
_He closed his eyes and willed himself away, far to some fantasy of himself leaving home at eighteen.


	4. Chapter 4

Monday morning Vic was driving to school, he usually went early to see his friends and borrow homework. Mayday parade was playing loudly in his black Lexus, and he was driving pretty slow, just taking his time. A red stop sign appeared in his vision and he stopped, a small, dark form in a black hoodie crossed in front of him. The Latino watched the person shuffle away, head down, earphones in. _Wait. Is that Kellin?_ He pulled up alongside the small frame, hoping he was right. After taking a breath and putting on an air of confidence he honks the horn. The poor boy on the sidewalk almost jumped out of his skin. He turned and angrily yelled, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU—Vic?!" His large blue eyes looked about four times larger than usual and consumed his entire pale face. When he looked down embarrassedly Vic's heart broke just a little. He turned his music down and leaned out the open window, "Want a ride?"  
He had half expected the boy to say no, so when he shook his head Vic wasn't surprised. He was surprised, however, when Kellin changed his mind. The dark head looked up and the ice-colored eyes locked with the Mexican's brown. A still small voice answered him timidly, "Yeah... That'd be great." Vic's eyebrows raised a little. _Really? _He leaned over and pushed the door open and the smaller boy got in.

Kellin looked out the window most of the ride, as they drove in silence. Finally Vic turned the music back up and the shorter boy perked up immediately.  
"Is that When You See My Friends?"  
The darker boy looked surprised to hear him speak, "What? Uh, yeah. Yeah it is. You listen to Mayday Parade?"  
Listen to them? He knew every song by heart. "Yeah, I've heard them a couple times…" He tried to leave off with that, before Vic asked more questions. But he did, "That's so cool. What other bands do you like?"  
Kellin shrugged, "Of Mice and Men, A Day to Remember, Paramore, Alesana, Black Veil Brides, All Time Low, The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus, Augustana, Death Cab for Cutie, Bullet For my Valentine… Stuff like that." He could've kept going for hours.  
The chocolate eyes just watched with wonder, "Dude! Those are like, my favorite bands!"  
"No way! That's really cool…" _He's just trying to make conversation Kellin. Get a hold of yourself. _He deflected conversation most the remainder of the trip.

Vic watched Kellin slink off to class. Why was he so drawn to this small and quiet boy? Why couldn't he get into his shell? Why did he want to? _Gaaaaaaay. No. Vic, you're straight. Straight. Straight. Straight. Straight. STRAIGHT! _  
He slouched in his desk at the back of class and frowned at his hands. Jaime, one of his best friends, interrupted his mental argument, "Hey broha! What's up?" The fellow Mexican slid into the desk beside Vic. "Uh… Nothing… Ha." Jaime started telling him about some adventure he had on his way to school, but Vic wasn't listening. His mind was elsewhere. Last year he had had feelings for another guy, but he had ignored them and the boy ended up moving… He thought that was it. The Latino had sworn to himself that was the last time he would feel that way for anyone of the same sex. This couldn't be that… It couldn't. The way he felt about Kellin was different… it was stronger. And that scared him.


	5. Chapter 5

***Author's note*  
I am so sorry for deserting you all, I hope you haven't forgotten about me! I kept wanting to write and post more chapters, but I got so caught up in work and school I was unable to do anything. Fortunately, all that time gave me plenty of ideas; and summer is here now. So, you may look forward to much more from me here on out! 3**

Kellin writhed on the bed beneath Vic's fingers. The Mexican was doing things that Kellin hadn't even dreamed of; touching just the right places at the right time. A gasp escaped his lips when the other boy slid down and engaged his mouth. His small chest began heaving and his eyes rolled back in his head. He felt himself getting closer, closer, closer. Just when he thought he was about to explode there was a knock on the door. A rough female voice hollered,  
"Kellin! Kellin! Kellin! Hey, sweetie-"

Kellin jolted back to reality where his English teacher was kneeling by his desk saying,  
"-are you okay? You seem to be hyperventilating. Do you need to go to the nurse?"

_What? _  
"No, no, I'm good." Was all he could manage.

The teacher looked concerned and unconvinced, "No honey, I think you'd better go to the nurses office. Do you know where it is?"

The dark haired boy sighed heavily and mumbled, "Yeah okay," before getting up grabbing his backpack and leaving the classroom.

Vic eventually succeeded in pushing the small, strange boy to the back of his mind and focusing on more important things. Like his friends. Not the teachers or class, none of _that _was important. But the smaller boy kept popping back up, like a jack-in-the-box with a broken lid, in Vic's mind. His friends talked about the attractive girls in the room, rated their physical attributes, the like. But Vic couldn't get himself to be interested. Tony would say a girl had a "nice ass", Vic would think about Kellin's eyes. Jaime would say a girl had a "delicious rack", Vic would think about Kellin's pink lips. The other two boys would joke about grabbing a girls ponytail, all Vic could think of was Kellin's quiet laugh.  
Thoughts of the pale boy consumed him all day. It was almost more than he could handle.

As soon as the last bell rang he was gone.

The Mexican sat at a stoplight in his sports car, listening to some Spanish rap song his brother Mike had given him, and wondered where he was headed. He of course ended up at Kellin's park; the little forest they first met in. He climbed out of his car and prayed to God Kellin would be there. And that he wouldn't.

Kellin didn't go home like the nurse had advised, instead, he went to the band room and played guitar for a while. Mr. D., the band director, came in and found him, and although he was slightly aware of the boy's situation he had to kick him out,  
"You know if it were up to me I'd let you stay here all the time bud, but the Blevvins has been checking rooms lately and I don't want you to get in trouble."  
Gary Blevvins was the vice principle. He used to be a teacher, but was promoted last year. Unlikely as it seems, in a town so small, he had quickly become power hungry and obsessed. None of the students, and even most of the staff liked him anymore.

"Okay. See you tomorrow then," Kellin said as he packed up his guitar and slung his worn backpack over his shoulder. He understood, and Mr. D. was his favorite teacher, he didn't want him fired or anything. So he went to his place in the woods, as usual. Then he remembered Vic and moved farther into the trees, just in case he showed up again. _He won't though. Why would he want to see you? Piece of shit. _

Vic found himself disappointed when he didn't find Kellin in the first little glen where he usually went. He sat down on the large log and wondered what he was doing with his life. _Why did you want to see him anyway? You're not really friends. But I'd like to be friends… Why? He hasn't given you anything. He sure doesn't seem interested. _Maybe that was why. Everyone liked Vic. Everyone wanted to be his friend. The pale, strange boy was a mystery. A challenge.  
_But he's more than that… He's… Beautiful. Not like any of the girls I've been with, he's… Fuck Vic! You. Are. Not. Gay! _  
He laid back on the log an close his eyes, trying to block out thoughts of Kellin and his crystal blue eyes. _Birds, listen to the birds. Focus on something else. Birds._ But the sound he heard was no birds, it wasn't any woodland animal. It was a guitar gently playing and a voice singing quietly.

"And I don't want the world to see me,  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand  
When everything's meant to be broken,  
I just want you to know who I am,"

This rendition of it was different than The GooGoo Dolls'; smoother, softer. The voice, which Vic had instantly recognized as Kellin's, was higher and had a strong calming quality about it.

"You can't fight the tears that ain't coming,  
Or the moment of truth in your lies  
When everything feels like the movies  
Yeah, you bleed just to know your alive

And I don't want the world to see me,  
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand,"

Here Vic felt his own voice joining the other boy's, harmonizing softly,

"I just want you to know who I am  
I just want you to know who I am, yeah  
I just want you to know who I am"

During the last line the guitar had stopped, Vic didn't notice. He continued to lay on the log with his eyes closed. A voice sounded much closer than he had expected one to,  
"What are you doing here?"  
Vic was so startled he fell off the log and onto his face. Even though it hurt his eyes and he got leaves in his mouth Kellin laughed, so it was worth it. He had never heard him laugh before. It was light, and ringed in his ears like little bells. He lifted his brown face from the ground,  
"I'm uh, checking out the scenery."  
The smaller boy raised an amused brow, "In the soil?"  
Vic chuckled as he sat up, "Yes sir. In the soil." _Who uses the word "soil"?  
_Kellin smiled a real smile, with teeth and everything, "And how's it looking?"  
Vic looked him up and down, "Pretty damn good…" _Oh my god.  
_Blue eyes became dinner plates for a moment as the owner understood what just happened. A dark head shook as if ridding itself of a silly idea, and then a normal sullenly blank one replaced the expressive look on his face.  
"Uh… Good. I guess."  
_God damnit Vic!  
__**"**_Well uh, I'm uh, I'm going to go…" The dark jeans walked off into the trees before Vic could say anything else.  
_No… Shit. Go get him! And say what? _Vic didn't know, but he set off to do it anyway.  
"Wait uh, let me give you a ride!"


	6. Chapter 6

To say the silence in the car was awkward would be an understatement. Neither of the boys spoke for at least ten minutes, their heads busy with thoughts. They didn't go to Kellin's house. Kimberly, Idaho was a small town, but it was big enough they could loop through all the streets and not actually get anywhere.  
Kellin prayed silently that the taller boy would turn on music or something, anything to make this less uncomfortable. Vic did, and he asked if Kellin wanted the windows down. The pale boy just shrugged. He watched the glass move down about half way as he listened to the quiet music that the Mexican clicked on his Ipod. It was a soft, acoustic sounding duet between a guy and a girl.

When the day comes to an end  
_Stars fill the sky  
I'll kiss the lids above your eyes  
and sing you goodnight_

You are the scent of autumn air  
Wind that cools me  
I am the summer in your hair  
Warm and cozy

Vic was singing along almost too quiet to hear. His voice was like nothing Kellin had ever heard, gentle and strained at the same time. He sounded sad, even though the lyrics seemed happy. The sound sent a small pain through Kellin's heart for some reason, but it was even worse when the other boy noticed him watching and stopped singing, instead asking, "Do you listen to Love, Robot?  
Kellin shook his head and the tan boy did a small shrug, "They're pretty great. The girl is super bad ass. You should look them up sometime."  
The dark haired boy nodded and said something like, "okay."  
They resumed their silence; Kellin was looking out the window. They passed the street to his house but he didn't say anything. A part of him really wanted to stay here, with Vic, forever.

"What did you say?"  
_What? Oh my god was that out loud? Fuck!  
_"What? Oh uh… Nothing."

Vic drove slowly, not because he didn't know where he was going, but because he didn't want to get there. He didn't want Kellin to get out of this car and miss another chance. _Another chance to what? Do you want to kiss him? No. No I don't, I just want to… I don't know. Ha! You do want to kiss him, you faggot! No! I'm not! I'm straight!_

A part of Vic panicked and he pulled over abruptly, throwing Kellin forward a little in his seat.  
"Can you walk from here?"  
The smaller boy looked shocked, "Uh… yeah… I can…. It's just… Over there a bit… I'll… I'm sorry."  
His face was covered in hurt before he looked down and opened the door to get out. That pain, he looked so betrayed. He closed the door gently, and Vic heard a soft, "I'm sorry," through the half open window. The tan boy clenched his jaw and pressed the gas. He looked at his rearview mirror and saw the smaller boy sink onto the sidewalk, still watching his car drive away. Images of blood soaked grass and a frail arm with scars for skin flooded his mind. Instead of the road in front of him he saw Kellin leaning against that tree in the forest, he saw him sitting alone in the hall during lunch every day. _Oh no… _Overwhelmed with guilt and fear for this boy he stopped his car and pulled the wheel into a U-turn.

_Of course he left you. Stupid boy, you knew he wouldn't stay. He doesn't feel anything for you. He's wonderful. You aren't. You aren't worth anything. You know he doesn't care about you.  
_His guitar and backpack were still in the backseat too, the other boy had driven off before he had a chance to grab them. His guitar was all he really had, and the sad thing was he didn't really care. Kellin felt himself fall to his knees and sit down, he didn't want to go home. He didn't want to be here. All he wanted was to be with Vic. _But he hates you. You are ugly and fat and he hates you. _He felt tears well up in his eyes, and why not? No one was here to see. _Nobody would care anyway. _So he let himself cry, and didn't notice the black Lexus turn around and come back. His thoughts blocked out the sound of the car approaching and turning off. It wasn't until the door slammed that he looked up. _Oh no. Oh no no no no. He's going to see how weak and disgusting you are and hate you even more. _Kellin began to stand up but Vic was by his side before he succeeded. He saw a tan arm rise up by his face and braced himself for the hit. It didn't come of course. Instead he felt strong arms wrap around his shoulders again. _What?_

When Vic realized that the other boy was crying he felt a piece of him die. He was by his side in an instant. He reached up to wipe a tear of the pale face but it flinched. _He thinks I'm going to hurt him. Oh Kellin… What happened to you?_ Almost without noticing he's doing it he pulls the frail body to him. It stiffens. After a few minutes though, he feels him relax and their bodies melt together, as if they were two pieces of a whole. It's unlike anything he's ever felt before. It's too soon when he feels Kellin pull away. He can't quite make himself let go. The baby blue eyes staring into his are so full of sadness and question, he feels himself tear up as well.  
"I… I'm sorry Kellin. I'm so sorry," he whispers, his voice sounding much weaker than he intended. "You know I would never even dream of hurting you right?"  
Kellin just looks at him, confused and scared and doubtful. Vic felt himself keep talking, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry."  
A small voice replies, "It's okay…"  
He sounded so broken. Suddenly Vic fills with rage. Pushing the other boy back he says, "No. No it isn't fucking okay! Who did this to you? Who hurt you so badly that you can't even eat? Who made you hate yourself so much that you cut yourself open?"  
The thin face just look at him for a while. He feels another pang of guilt, "I know. I know. I'm so sorry for doing that to you. I was just… I was scared."  
At that word Kellin's eyebrows shoot up and he looks more confused than Vic had ever seen anyone look. "You are scared… of me?"  
Vic looks into his eyes and watches the realization. "No! Not like that. You are… I'm not scared of you. You're perfect. You're perfect and beautiful and sweet and smart and I've never felt this way before and it scares me."  
_Oh god… Did I just say that?  
_Kellin's eyes grew impossibly large. "What did you just say?"  
_Well… It's now or never I guess. _Vic looked into the boy's eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, then leaned in and kissed him. Hard.  
It wasn't more than five seconds, and Kellin didn't kiss back. When Vic pulled back Kellin looked completely and totally stunned. The other boy could only sputter, "V-Vic. W-What the hell?!"  
Vic found himself at a loss for words. _Yeah Vic, what the hell?_  
All of the sudden Kellin was gone, running down the block and disappearing in an alley. The Latino walked slowly back to his car, got in, put the key in the ignition, but didn't turn it.  
_What the hell?_


End file.
